Logistics

It's amazing how many things have gone right in this whole scenario, but things don't always fall into place. Looks like Krysta will have to take me to Boston after all. Not sure I want to spend 8 hours in the car with someone who has mono - but her dr. said as long as we don't share bodily fluids, I'm ok. She shouldn't have to be driving for 8 hours either - she feels like crap. But other options just didn't work out. I think we might stay over Tues night with my friend Karen in Rockport, and take our time getting back on Wed. That should make it work out better. I'm thinking she won't be able to go to the hospital with me though - last thing they need there is someone with Mono! Everyone tells me that I have to learn to accept help from people, and not try to do everything myself, but trust me, it's not easy to have to depend on people to do things for you - even though I know they want to help - sometimes it just doesn't work out.

It was a weird morning - didn't feel 100% - felt a little woozy. I did go to church, but when I got there, I wondered if I did the right thing. My friend Percilla, who went through BC last year said that some days are just like that - out of the blue, one day you're a little off. Off and on all day, I was a little woozy, but still managed to have a really nice day. Bob and I went to Saratoga, had some lunch, and I went looking for a couple of tops to wear over these drains...it's a challenge. I have one boob (the implant) all smushed and pushed to the side and taped down, the other is there in all it's glory with no bra, and then there's this big lump for the drains - I'm a real prize right now LOL!!! So trying to find clothes to cover all that is a challenge! Especially since, they probably won't be things I'll wear after. In fact, I have no idea what I'll wear after. I'm probably going to go down from a DD to possibly even a C. They told me they used the biggest implant they use for mascectomy, and it still wasn't as big as my other breast! So before I had one Big mama and one Dcup - now I'll have one Dcup and one maybe C. Surprisingly, I just find it all kind of humorous. I thought it might feel tragic. I don't mean to diminish it - I'm sure that losing a breast can be very tragic and traumatic, but it just doesn't seem to feel that way. Hopefully, I'll still feel the same way when I get to see my new breast revealed. I'm thinking that if Bob didn't run like hell when he helped me get dressed to go home from the hospital, I'm safe with him! Part of me wants to post a photo of lumpy Kathi - but then again - NO way!!! My friend and former boss, Darcy who is just finishing with her BC treatment showed up to lunch a couple of weeks ago with no wig - or no hat - and she looked fabulous!!! But that will never happen with me - I have a flat little bean head - so it'll always be a wig or a hat for me!!! Hmmmm, tomorrow I have to call some chemo doctors and start looking for a wig.